Bits moved from here to there. After thirty years, we finally stopped the leaks.
Our job is to move bits from Point A to Point B. We are the plumbing, not the inspector. We do not look at your content. We do not scan your attachments. We do not use your words to train machines. Your signal is your own. We simply facilitate the transit through the Iron.
We do not provide backdoors for commerce. We do not harvest your metadata for brokers. We have spent three decades watching the free internet eat people, so we built a wall. If someone wants your data, they have to go through you, not us.
There are no advertisements here. No trackers. No recommended products. We make money by moving bits from here to there and maintaining the Iron. That is the beginning and the end of our financial interest in your identity. We sell peace and indirection, nothing else.
Per the Section Two Hundred Thirty Shield, Donkey Waffle is an interactive computer service, not a publisher. We provide the conduit, and you provide the content. We are legally immune from the Signal you choose to transmit. Donkey Waffle operates as a conduit service. We transmit content on behalf of users but do not create or control it. Responsibility for transmitted content remains with the sender. We just keep the Iron hot.
Registry Anchor. Managed by Entire Tribes of Donkeys.
Support. You can email support at donkey waffle dot com for more information. Please be advised that we may or may not get back to you with an answer sometime in the digital future. Our priority is the plumbing, not the paperwork.
Backup Alert.
Notice. We accidentally dropped the backups into the river. We are working on it. But they are likely gone. Sorry. Move forward, do not look back.
Zero Tracking. We do not log your metadata for sale. Your identity is your property.
Resilience. Our systems are designed for one hundred percent offline capability if the backbone fails. Disaster Recovery is priority one.
Data Destruction. If you close your account, we securely wipe your sector to strict military standards. No residuals.
Human Loop. Real engineers manage this gear, not unmonitored scripts. Humans remain in the loop.